10 secret Tips For A Successful Monogamous Relationship
Monogamy isn't for everyone. Whether you have a nagging
feeling in the back of your mind that one person alone can't satisfy you
sexually or know for certain that multiple partners are a must, it can be
tricky to figure out how have a successful open relationship.
In the top ten reasons why individuals and couples come to
me for intimacy and sexuality coaching is the reality that they have simply
stopped having sex. Many think that what they need is "Sexual
CPR". They know it is not because
they have stopped loving each other, or even think that they have stopped
finding each other sexy. It's just that they are not "turned on" or
excited by each other anymore. The problem is time and togetherness can wear
down erotic energy in long-term relationships.
If you are in a long term monogamous relationship, and you
have stopped having sex, or sex is very infrequent, you may think you are
broken or something is wrong with you or your relationship. It might be
comforting to know that you are far from alone.
Sexual boredom and the lack of fire are often the reasons
why some people reach outside of their long term relationship even though they
are still happy with their partner on all other levels.
1. Realize that there will be ups and downs
Throughout every
relationship there are always going to be ups and downs. While a truly good
relationship always has more ups than downs, there is most likely going to be a
fair bit of both. It is crucial that you prepare for yourself for this fact
when going into a relationship so that you have an easier time dealing with it
later on. A lot of people think that relationships are all happiness and
sunshine all the time, and the hard truth is that isn’t the case. You must be
ready to deal with the bad as well as the good.
2. Appreciate each other
You
will also need to make sure that you appreciate each other on a deep level
consistently. The only way that your relationship is going to work is if you
have constantly appreciate what you have in each other. A lot of people make
this mistake of taking each other for granted, and that almost never turns out
very well at all. The more you learn to appreciate each other over time, the
stronger your mutual bond will become within the relationship.
3.
Face all the problems you have as a team
Any one person’s problem in the
relationship is also the other person’s problem, so you will need to face all
issues as a team. This sort of teamwork mentality is essential when it comes to
having a healthy, happy and long lasting monogamous relationship. If you want
to make it the distance as a couple, you will have to always remember this tip.
You simply won’t last very long as a couple if you aren’t dealing with all of
your issues together in a collaborative way.
4. Communication is key
Most
people know that communication is an important part of any relationship, but
they don’t really understand to what extent. Being good at communicating in
your relationship means more than just talking about how your day was at dinner
together. You need to share your thoughts and feelings with each other on a
regular basis. The bare minimum simply isn’t enough when it comes to
communication, so it is crucial that you keep that in mind.
5. Say “I love you”
to each other often
Even doing something as simple as saying “I love you” to
each other on a regular basis can really help you out as a couple. By saying
this to each other each day you will grow stronger as a couple and remain
strong throughout the years. Words can have a lot of power when it comes to a
romantic relationship, and telling your partner that you love them will
maintain the bond and connection you have with them through even the toughest
of times.
6. Set aside quality time for yourselves each day
It can be difficult
to set aside even a small amount of quality time as a couple each day when you
are both very busy, but it’s still important that you do so. When you carve out
time to spend with each other in a meaningful way on a regular basis, you will
be able to keep the passion and romance alive for many years to come. One of
the biggest mistakes that couples make is to not do this and get caught up in
their own lives too much.
7. Experience new things Together
You will also want
to make a point of trying new things together as often as possible. Whether it
is going skydiving or just trying a new type of food, it is important that you
do it as a couple. The more new experiences you have together, the stronger
your bond will become over time. It’s always a good idea to try new things in
life, and it’s even better when you are going so with someone who you really
love.
8. Don’t forget to be Spontaneous
Being spontaneous can help keeping your
relationship on its toes, especially when you have been together for a long
time. It’s important that you learn to be spontaneous as a couple so you can
always keep the magic going no matter what. Take turns planning special dates
that will be a lot of fun for the both of you. This will help you maintain an
exciting and adventurous spirit in your relationship that will stand the test
of time if you do all the necessary work as a couple.
9. Never Say things out
of Anger
While it can be difficult to control what we say when we are really
angry at the person we’re with, it is crucial nonetheless to work on doing so.
The last thing you want to do is to say something in anger that you cannot take
back. All couples have disagreements from time to time, but it’s important that
you do not let those disagreements turn into hateful screaming matches. As
mature adults you should always be able to speak to each other with respect no
matter what the issue is.
10. Keep things interesting in the Bedroom
There is
no faster way to turn a relationship sour than becoming too complacent in the
bedroom. You will want to explore different ways of being physically intimate
with each other so you can keep things exciting and interesting for a very long
time to come. In the end you will be very glad that you decided to do this
because of how beneficial it can be for your relationship as a whole. If you
want to maintain a healthy monogamous relationship, it is certainly necessary
to make a point of spicing things up in the bedroom once in a while.
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